Again, I questioned what went wrong - is it wrong to aspire to achieve big things at a very early stage in life, or was it my fault to be born in a Tier-3 city. Jealousy, anger and sadness - I experienced all these emotions at such great intensity that it transformed me into an under-confident and lost child. My roommates, from whom I used to run away, achieved everything possible that was there in the MBA curriculum and then there was me who had nothing.
The Midway
In the middle of the MBA, I committed the mistake of ending my 4-year long relationship and karma came back to bite me during my internship process. Being among the last people to get placed, I felt the world had come to an end and the amount of loan hovered in front of me. The struggle didn’t end there. I loved the company which I got into and did every possible market visit to get the PPO, but the company went into restructuring process and sweetly apologized to me with a regret mail.
PPO conversion became the talk of the town and I pull my happy face to hide what I felt within. The people who were my best friends turned into reporters to give updates of everyone’s PPO.
Also read: Internship Experiences of other b-school students
The Climax
Life is what happens when you are busy making plans, and I was busy thinking about how I would prepare for Final Placements. Alas, an opportunity, which I never dreamt of, did knock on my door. My shortlist of Google came and here, I thought again that I was not capable of getting through it. But this was the time for me to make the most of the only single chance that came along my way. I prepared and consistently did the hard work for it. I turned every stone around and gave up every possible thing that I could.
Surprisingly, I sailed through 5 interviews and now the jitters came back to me. I tried hard not to think of the outcome but everywhere I could see my 1.5 years of struggle and the urge to be back in the game by regaining my confidence.
I never imagined it would happen and it did happen - a hug from a Placecomm member and I still questioned - Was it true? I demanded proof and they replied by hugging me the second time. Yes, I made it to Google. Tears did drop from my eyes and it was a dream which I never dreamt of.
Life changed from there onwards. I made the most of the last three months of my journey. I earned respect from people around and made great friends for a lifetime.
The End of An Era
One of my roommates, who was from the Placement Committee, treated me like a sister throughout the process and the other, the topper, became a reason for my laughter. I attribute my success to my roommates, the person who became my best friend in the journey and my broken relationship. They all inspired me to learn, pull myself together and transformed me to my stronger self than I was before.
I learnt success doesn’t come to us for the things which we do occasionally, it comes when we work towards it constantly. After looking back, I don’t think a single all-nighter or a competition was a waste, they all became a stepping stone to the success which I achieved. I cried, failed, struggled as I was a misfit but the people around me helped me to mould my own story and accepted me the way I was and hence, in the process, Courage and Heart just happened to me.
But I know,
"Till the time I have a fire within,
My struggle will never end
But that fire will keep me going"
****
You may also be interested in reading about overcoming and dealing with the imposter syndrome at a B-school.
Comments
Mokshagna Sai Komatipolu
Motivating!!
17 Jun 2019, 08.39 PM
Siddhivinayak Shende
Thank you for writing this. Much needed motivation.
18 Jun 2019, 09.20 PM
Kiran S
Project Engineer, MAHLE Engine Components India Pvt Ltd
Very well written! Totally relatable.
10 Aug 2019, 01.55 AM